Work-Life Balance Is a Lie That’s Costing You More Than You Realise
For many women, the concept of work-life balance has become a north star to measure how we are doing in terms of ticking the boxes of success, happiness, and satisfaction. We’ve been told that achieving balance will help us juggle the competing demands of work, family, friendships, self-care, and personal growth seamlessly. Yet, instead of bringing fulfilment the pursuit of balance often leaves high functioning women who are so busy already doing it all for everyone else in a state of overwhelm, burnout, and perpetual inadequacy.
The truth is, work-life balance is a lie. It’s an unrealistic ideal that sets us up for failure, creating a never ending to-do list that only adds more pressure to our already full lives.
The Myth of Balance: Why It Doesn’t Work
The term "work-life balance" implies that life can be divided into neat compartments, each receiving equal attention and energy. It suggests that we still aren’t doing enough and if we juggle our time and priorities just right, we will be in a sweet spot.. But life rarely works this way.
In reality, balance often feels like a juggling act where you’re trying to keep all the balls in the air- career, relationships, parenting, friendships, health, and hobbies, without dropping any. And while social media and societal expectations can make it seem like others have it all figured out, the truth is that most women feel the same pressure and exhaustion.
Here’s why the idea of balance is flawed:
It’s Unrealistic: Life is dynamic, not static. Demands and priorities shift constantly, making it impossible to maintain an equal distribution of energy across all areas.
It Ignores Us As Individuals: What works for one person may not work for another. Balance assumes a one-size-fits-all approach, ignoring our uniqueness, our values, goals, and circumstances.
It Grows Our Guilt: When we fall short of achieving this elusive balance, it’s easy to blame ourselves. This guilt only compounds the stress and burnout we’re already experiencing.
The Cost of Chasing Balance
Many women who strive for work-life balance end up feeling stretched too thin, frazzled and still unfulfilled. Instead of thriving, they find themselves:
Burnt Out: Trying to do it all leaves little time for rest and rejuvenation and the body system becomes compromised.
Disconnected: Being busy with everything often means you’re truly present for none of the things.
Unfulfilled: Even after ticking every task on your to do list, you feel like something’s missing, questioning your purpose and what even are your dreams beyond everyone else’s expectations of you.
Perhaps the biggest cost of chasing balance is the toll it takes on your well-being and self concept of your identity. Over time, the pressure to manage all the things can lead to resentment, dissatisfaction, and a sense of losing who you truly are at your core, beyond all the roles and responsibilities.
A New Approach: From Balance to Alignment
So, if balance isn’t the answer, what is? The key lies in shifting your focus from balancing everything equally to aligning your life with what truly matters.
Alignment is about integrating your priorities, values, and purpose into your daily life in a way that feels authentic and sustainable. It’s not a process of perfection; it’s about being intentional with your energy and choosing to spend it on what genuinely fulfils you.
Here’s how you can start working on alignment:
Identify Your Values: What matters most to you? Whether it’s family, creativity, health, or career growth, get clear on your priorities so you can focus your energy on them.
Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to what doesn’t serve you. This could mean declining additional work projects, scaling back social obligations, or outsourcing tasks.
Honour Your Needs: Make your wellbeing non-negotiable. This might mean carving out time for rest, exercise, or simply doing something that lights you up consistently.
Let Go of Guilt: Remember, you’re not meant to do it all. Let go of guilt to choose yourself sometimes! It allows you to show up fully in the areas that matter most with more energy.
Adapt Flexibility: Life will always throw curveballs. Being emotionally flexible and malleable will help you stay grounded and aligned, even when things don’t go as planned.
Why Alignment Is More Fulfilling
Unlike balance, which often feels like a rigid and unattainable standard, alignment allows for fluidity and grace. When your life is aligned with your values and needs:
You’ll feel more present and engaged in the moment.
Your decisions will be guided by purpose rather than pressure.
Your actions reflect what truly matters to you and so will the outcomes.
Alignment isn’t about dividing your energy evenly; it’s about directing it intentionally.
Taking the First Step
Making the shift from balance to alignment starts with a simple yet powerful decision: to prioritise yourself. This doesn’t mean neglecting your adult responsibilities, it means recognising that your well-being is the base layer for everything else in your life.
If you’re ready to let go of the myth of balance and create a life that feels aligned and purposeful, I invite you to download my free guide, Beyond Busy. In this guide, you’ll find practical steps to break free from burnout, set boundaries, and live in alignment with your values.
Remember, you’re not alone on this journey. Many women are walking this very same path, and together, we can rewrite what success and fulfilment truly look like. It’s time to stop burning yourself out in the pursuit of balance and start building alignment.
Download the free guide, Beyond Busy, and take the first step toward a life you love.